


There's a Fine, Fine Line

by ThatBohoFemme



Series: Tsavd danem [4]
Category: World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Awkwardness, Boys In Love, M/M, Set in September-ish 2020, Tags Are Hard, difficult conversations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-24
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:16:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27699530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatBohoFemme/pseuds/ThatBohoFemme
Summary: It would be so easy to hunt Seth down and make him pay for every horrible thing he has done to Buddy Murphy. Yet, Mustafa resists. He isn't like that. Violence isn't the answer.Besides, what good is that going to do if Buddy keeps going back to Seth like a kicked dog?This is an impossible situation.
Relationships: Mustafa Ali/Buddy Murphy
Series: Tsavd danem [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1890469
Comments: 1
Kudos: 6





	There's a Fine, Fine Line

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mithen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mithen/gifts).



> Let's set this in September-ish 2020 before Mustafa was revealed as the leader of Retribution.

Mustafa can't sleep. Every time he begins to drift, the gravity of the situation jolts him awake. 

Rolling over, he leans up, resting his head in his hand. He takes in Buddy's sleeping form, and wonders how he got so lucky. 

Buddy's hair fans out across the pillow, and his lips part as he softly snores- something Mustafa finds oddly endearing. Buddy carries a sort of peace that Mustafa never sees when Buddy's awake. 

What could he possibly be dreaming of? 

In the still of the night, Mustafa finds himself forced to confront the one thing he hates to admit. He's fallen _hard_ for Buddy. He can't imagine life without this beautiful man by his side. 

That makes what he must do _that_ much harder.

Mustafa smooths the blankets over Buddy. He holds his breath as Buddy stirs but doesn't waken. 

Mustafa _hates_ what Seth has done to Buddy. He's dimmed Buddy's light, using any tactic he can. This makes Mustafa seethe with rage but he refuses to act on it. 

It would be so easy to hunt Seth down and make him pay for every horrible thing he has done to Buddy Murphy. Yet, Mustafa resists. He isn't like that. Violence isn't the answer. 

Besides, what good is that going to do if Buddy keeps going back to Seth like a kicked dog? 

This is an impossible situation.

Burdened by the weight of his thoughts, Mustafa pushes out of bed. He's careful not to wake Buddy. 

Groping blindly in the dark, he pulls on the first thing he finds- basketball shorts. Since they belong to Buddy, they're a little big but Mustafa doesn't care. He just tightens the drawstring and continues dressing. 

He would never consider Buddy a waste of time. It's just _frustrating_ to play second fiddle to someone who's a damn psychopath. 

Now dressed, he prepares to leave. This fucking sucks. If this were a movie, Buddy would come to his senses, let Mustafa put him back together and they'd run off into the sunset as sweeping music plays. 

Unfortunately, this is real life. It's not the movies. Right now, there can be no happy ending. 

Regardless of what he does, someone's always going to lose. 

Standing in the doorway, Mustafa gazes over his shoulder and memorizes every detail of Buddy's perfect face lit by the moon. He's not sure when-if ever- he'll see this again and he wants to have this to hold onto. 

Mustafa knows he should wait for Buddy to wake up but he's a coward. If he waits, he may never leave. 

He's damned if he does. He's damned if he doesn't. 

Mustafa chooses the easy way out. He isn't giving up on Buddy but he needs space. He needs space and time to process all of this. He needs to find the courage to give Buddy the ultimate ultimatum. He needs to find an answer to the one question consistently haunting him.

How can he love someone who clearly can't love themselves? 

Mustafa gathers what he can find of his stuff. For someone who has only been there a few nights, he hasn't exactly traveled light. 

Then again... if he leaves something here, it's an excuse to come back.

God- he's got it bad. 

Feeling ridiculous, Mustafa leaves Buddy's house and heads to the nearest 24 hour donut shop listed on Google Maps. He knows he shouldn't care but he isn't a cruel man. The _least_ he can do is make sure Buddy has something resembling breakfast. 

Even with a broken heart, Mustafa can't stop caring. 

Maybe that means something. 

His errand finished, Mustafa sets the box of donuts on the passenger seat. Their warm sugary sweetness perfumes the air around him. Normally, they would make him hungry but tonight, he barely notices. 

He lets out a sad hollow laugh, as he heads back to Buddy's house. He'll write his note, drop the donuts off and do his best to get on with his life- the entire time hoping Buddy pulls his head out of his ass, realizing how loved he is by someone who isn't Seth. 

Mustafa Ali is a man ruled by his heart. He also has been blessed with solid instinct. When he follows said instinct in conjunction with his heart, he's okay. 

Hadn't he known this was a bad idea from the start? Why had he let Buddy in? 

Mustafa's only sure of one thing. 

The more he knows, the less he understands.

He stops in front of Buddy's house. All the lights are still off. It's clear Buddy's still sleeping. 

Mustafa's got this. 

He opens the glove box, searching for the small legal pad he always keeps there. Finding it, he then grabs a black sharpie- the only pen he can find. 

Then, he writes. 

_B,  
I had to head out but you looked so peaceful that I couldn't bear to wake you up. Please don't hate me- this isn't goodbye. More of a see you soon. _

_You're stuck with me. I just need some space.  
Love,  
M._

Mustafa reads over the note, and _hates_ it. He imagines Buddy finding this piece of shit, reading it and suddenly, it's all worse. Mustafa's the one who pushes him over the edge. 

He rips the page off the pad, crumples it up and tosses it in the backseat. Holding his breath, he puts Sharpie to paper and tries again. 

_B,_

_I had to go but didn't want to wake you._

_Things are strange now- I need some space. I promise I'll be in touch._

_This isn't goodbye._

_M._

_P.S- Please don't hate me._

That's almost better but still not right. Mustafa reads it over and over again, trying to understand what's wrong with it. Tearing the page off, he tosses it behind him. 

Buddy deserves better. 

Mustafa knows he can't be one more person letting Buddy down. 

He sits there so long that the sun begins peeking over the horizon. The longer he sits there, the more he struggles with what to do. 

Why can't this be easy? 

Knocking on his window pulls him out of thought. Turning his head, Mustafa catches Buddy's eye as he lowers the window. "Hi."

"Why are you hanging out on the street?" Buddy eyes him skeptically as he sticks his head into the car. "And wearing my pants." 

"Well-" Mustafa grabs the box of donuts and holds them out. "I couldn't sleep, decided to get some air and.... donuts?" 

"I'll put on the coffee if you want to come back inside." Buddy shakes his head, as he steps back. 

Mustafa leaves the car with the donuts in hand. He's not sure he's making the right decision but he's going to do it, and hope it works out. 

With each step, his stomach churns with anxiety. So much can go wrong. 

Maybe he should have left quietly while Buddy slept. 

Mustafa settles into the breakfast nook and watches Buddy shuffle around the kitchen. Neither of them speak. 

"So." Buddy places a cup of coffee in front of Mustafa. "Would you like to tell me the truth?"


End file.
